6:02 a.m. Got bored so I decided to Google groundhogs.
6:03 a.m. Learned that groundhogs and woodchucks are, in fact, the same thing…who knew?
6:04 a.m. Wondered why groundhog isn’t two words. (woodchuck too, for that matter)
6:05 a.m. Still no sign of Phil or his shadow.
6:06 a.m. Questioned the spelling of Punxsutawney.
6:06 a. m. Decided to see if Groundhog Day was available on Netflix. Put it in my instant queue between CSI: Vatican City and Jackie Chan: Kung Fu Master.
6:07 a.m. Started to get hungry…all that waiting and wondering was building up a big appetite.
6:08 a.m. Wondered if the action of waiting and wondering burned any calories.
6:09 a.m. Checked my keep fit tracker app to see. Hmm, can’t find it under cardio exercises…maybe its considered anaerobic or maybe I need a better app.
6:10 a.m. Did someone say bacon?
6:11 a.m. Checked Twitter to see if the Bacon Bacon Truck was nearby.
7:00 a.m. Searched YouTube to see if anyone has done a “Sh*t groundhogs say” or “Sh*t people say on Groundhog Day” or “Sh*t white girls say to black girls dressed as Asian gay men living in San Francisco”. Found all of them and more.
7:10 a.m. Updated my Facebook page and included a self referential link.
7:12 a.m. Wondered what my life would be like if I had thought of Facebook first. Twittered the thought on LinkedIn
7:15 a.m. Wondered if the missing vowels in Tppr or Flickr had been found.
7:17 a.m. Spaced out thinking about space.
7:20 a.m. Breaking News
I interrupt this live blog for an unimportant announcement: Groundhog Day is a hoax. Phil’s prediction is determined ahead of time by the Inner Circle, a neo conservative group of men who don top hats, wear tuxedos and like to predict the weather. Think DaVinci Code without the DaVinci or The Code.
7:21 a.m. Feel betrayed by a rodent with the same name as my favorite uncle.
7:22 a.m. Wondered if Phil is more than just the prognosticator of meteorological events but maybe moral or ethical ones.
7:23 a.m. Learned that woodchucks don’t chuck that much wood…which means that the advanced tongue twister truth class I took to secure my honorary Phd was based on a lie.
7:22 a.m. Decided to offer a sale on all products in the Imagineering Store if Phil doesn’t see his shadow.
7:23 a.m. Changed my mind.
7:24 a.m. Decide to take the Downton Abbey character test.
7:25 a.m. Take the test again and again until I most resemble The Right Honourable Violet Crawley, Countess of Grantham. Honestly, what’s a weekend?
7:26 a.m. Still trying to figure out how to correctly spell Punxsatawaney
7:35 a.m. Just learned that Phil saw his shadow which either means 6 more weeks of Winter or 6 less weeks of Spring.