Live Delayed Blogging from my Desk

VEEP Debate

6:00 p.m. Order pizza. A large sausage and pepperoni. Hold the pineapple.

6:01 p.m. Decide to follow only two political pundits tonite: @thefauxjoe and @p90xryan on Twitter.

6:05 p.m.  Print out official vice presidential drinking game rules. Decide to substitute espresso for beer so I can stay awake.

6:10 p.m. Mute sound so I can properly analyze all non-verbal communications. Let the eye rolling, shrugging and finger pointing begin.

6:15 p.m. Decide to turn up sound so I can hear the candidates spin seriously complex issues into simple-simon like parables.

6:16 p.m. Wonder if Paul Ryan is related to Meg Ryan. 

6:17 p.m. Wonder if Paul Ryan ever wondered the same thing.

6:20 p.m. Feeling depressed. Start binging on hyperlinks. Can’t decide if I should call a therapist or make an appointment at the genius bar.

6:22 p.m.  Decide to create a game called That’s Debatable. First topic: When an alarm rings is it going on or off?   

6:23 p.m. Immediately secure the url.

6:16 p.m.  Wonder if Big Bird will get mentioned…although this may be more of an Elmo crowd. Now, That’s Debatable.

7:00 p.m.  Accessed the fact checker app on my phone. Hope it works better than the truth meter.

7:30 p.m. Grabbed my political ice pack for relief.

7:40 p.m. Wondered if Dan Quayle was watching the debate or reading looking at his complimentary copy of Pat the Politician.

7:45 p.m.  With all due respect looked up the word malarkey.

7:46 p.m. Uh-oh seems like the candidates are suffering from a severe case of interuptitus. For which there is but one cure—the interuptitus swatter.

8:22 p.m. Oops..caught myself shamelessly plagiarizing myself again (see 7:30 p.m. entry). Apologized to myself.

8:30 p.m. Searched for the best after parties. Looks like Kid Rock is having another kegger.

9:00 p.m. Thankfully the debate is over.  Ryan finished in less time than Biden. Must be that marathon training.